I'd like to simply blame it on the cold, but even that would be admitting defeat, in this case to an outside element and not an internal one. "What's he saying, exactly?" might be your question right now -- entirely valid.
I haven't done much in the last couple weeks. I started brightly, spending time and carefully constructing a training plan which I pledged to stick to. What happened?
The latest in a long line of failures in attempts to better myself, as have the others, has seen some dark days of late, and so soon after the beginning. I wish to promise, to swear to those of you that have been so kind to follow me and believe in me thus far -- and further still those who haven't given up hope in the past two weeks and stopped following my blog -- that I will get back on track, or that I will make it happen. At this point, I can't make such a bold declaration. I cannot make such a promise as I don't know at the moment that I have it in me.
When I am running, I have a tendency to take the long way. "I could run 2 miles or I could run 3 miles." 9/10 times I will take the harder route, to prove to myself that today, on this run, right now, I am capable. I can do it. This mentality at time creeps in to my everyday thinking, and sometimes it doesn't. When I don't have this, when I don't have motivation, when I don't have drive, I falter and sit on the couch for weeks at a time.
All I can do with honesty at this moment is start again and take it one day at a time. Tomorrow will be a good day.
